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Thursday, August 24, 2006

Summer comedies: Three quick reviews


Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest: Must see!
Johnny Depp is outrageously funny, and, while the movie is a little too long (whatever happened to the 1 1/2 hr action/comedy movie?) there are laughs and thrills aplenty. The cannibals' island got so much stuff you almost expect King Kong's dinosaurs to burst into the screen. The only minus is that this is the second part of a trilogy. The plus is that Keith Richards will be playing Jack Sparrow's dad in the third part, and it makes you want to go back for more.

Funniest sequence: Jack Sparrow's shishkebbab's drop down the cliff. Wilie Coyote would be envious.

Funniest line: "*Alas*, my children! This is the day you shall always remember as the day that you almost... {{{SPLASH}}} ...Captain Jack Sparrow."

Warning: There are shiploads of really scary monsters so real-little kids might not want to stay in the theater. Two little kids (twins?) had panic attack and beat a path to the door while we were there.

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby: Funny, but not because of Ricky Bobby who's too tiresome and obnoxious. NASCAR racing looks like fun if it didn't involve having to watch for hours to no end when you're at the actual racetrack.

Sasha Barron Cohen, however, steals the show as Jean Claude Girard (pronouncing his name to sound a lot like Jean Claude CHIRAC), a "formoola EHN" French driver who rides his way to the top of the NASCAR tour in a Perrier car.

Biggest surprise: Gary Cole's (Ricky Bobby's dad) lost a lot of weight.

Funniest line: "You taste like America!"

Warning: Coarse language coming from smart-aleck obnoxious kids, and from grownups, too. Sexual situations, too.
Scoop: Up to you.

Woody Allen has been beating us with the same shtick for nearly five decades now, and, after a series of thuddingly dull movies where he miserably attempted to be Ingmar Bergman, he's back to trying to be entertaining. The plot is not surprising, but at least follows a five characters-three acts format.

Minus: Lots of Woody on screen doing his usual.
Plus: When Hugh Jackman's on screen, you don't notice Woody. Or nothing much else.
Added pluses: Charles Dance, and Mr. Swearengen himself, Ian McShane, when Hugh's not on screen.

Plus: Scarlett Johansson.
Minus: Scarlett Johansson wearing clothes that came from What Not To Wear rejects, and sounding like Judy Julie Kavner.

Minus: Lame plot.
Plus: Lots of really nice real estate, and London locations.

Warning: A chick flick in whoddunit clothing. Bring a woman friend and discuss Peter Lyman as a prospective mate.

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At 10:22 AM, Blogger Sigmund, Carl and Alfred said...

Woody makes me laugh because no matter how bad it is, I'm not that whacked out.

Now Depp, he's funny. He really has found his calling. It really works because he's self deprecating, doesn't take himself too seriously and seems to enjoy being a 'real' person.

At 7:00 PM, Blogger Mamacita said...

CHARLES DANCE? I would leave my husband, children, mother, and home for Charles Dance.

I'm not kidding.

He's the sexiest most awesome actor in the universe.

Well, I wouldn't really leave the people I love most in the world for Charles Dance, but I'd be tempted.

I'm so excited now; I didn't know anybody else had ever HEARD of Charles Dance.

Don't think you're going to ever be his biggest fan, though. I've had that position covered since 1991.


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