Huffin' and puffin'
¡Gringo Unleashed!, whose motto is "no hay problemas, solo soluciones" (there are no problems, only solutions), posts on the annoyance that is the Huffington Post

Arianna Huffington's "blog" has been getting a lot of attention lately, since Arianna's well-sponsored and has been able to do her Zsa-Zsa imitation on TV and radio.

Catherine Seipp, however, recommends Huffington's Toast, the new blog parody by the brilliant Steve Graham (who's also the author of Eat What You Like and Die Like a Man, a cookbook I highly recommend). Seipp noticed that

the maniacally energetic Huffington’s Toast is filled with entries like this one, “not really by Arianna Huffington,” illustrated by a tiny mug shot of the Puerto Rican astrologer Walter Mercado as Arianna

Walter Mercado, who started his showbiz career as male romantic lead in Puerto Rican TV soap operas, a case of miscasting if there ever was one, has made a huge success of himself as TV astrologer and wearer of capes worthy of Queen Amidala. Go see what I mean. Walter's prose is worthy of Arianna. Here's what he got for Aries,

Si no cambias de actitud, si no modificas radicalmente tu comportamiento, tu situación se volverá difícil. Intenta abrigar grandes esperanzas para el futuro y siempre mira hacia adelante. Mantente al corriente y al día y responde a las tendencias del momento, tanto en cuestiones de estilo personal como en las ideas. Número de suerte: 02-08
If you don't change your attitude, if you don't radically modify your behavior, your situation will turn difficult. Try to shelter great hopes for the future and always look forward. Stay up to date and respond to current trends, both in matters of personal style as in ideas. Lucky number: 02-08

I can't wait for Arianna to hire Walter to do the Post's horoscopes.

That is, if Steve doesn't hire him first.